


Quentin’s 16th Summer

by Highkingeliot



Category: The Magicians (TV), The Magicians - Lev Grossman
Genre: Gen, Mental Health Issues, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-01
Updated: 2018-05-01
Packaged: 2019-04-30 23:17:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14507628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Highkingeliot/pseuds/Highkingeliot
Summary: Quentin’s first time being in the mental hospital one summer.





	Quentin’s 16th Summer

“Dad can we talk?” He anxiously asked while pacing and absentmindedly brushing the hair out of his eyes. 

“Sure curly Q, what’s up?” He asked taking a seat. 

“Something is... um... wrong.... I... “ he paused trying to come up with the right words to say. 

“Q, what’s going on?” 

“I just feel... I don’t know.... lost? Alone? Utterly fucked?” He looked down. 

“Q.” His father warned at that last statement. 

“Look it’s true. I don’t know what to say I just feel.... like worthless and like...” he stopped and made a few motions with his hands before letting his arms fall to his sides and slumping down in a chair. 

“Q, what do you need? Look, I’ll support you however I can but I need you to tell me what to do here.” 

“There’s this place...” he started pulling a crumpled paper from his bag. 

His father reached out and took the paper from him and looked at it. 

“Q, this is...”

“I... umm... know...” he ran his hand through his hair. 

“Ok.” He sat back and let out a slow deep breath. 

“You said I should get help so I tried to find this place and tried to find... you know..... help.” His voice trailed off. 

“Ok Q if this is what you think will help you, I’ll take you tomorrow.”

“Can we go today?” Quentin asked slowly. 

“Today?”

“Umm... yeah...” Quentin slowly rolled up his sleeves to show the cuts he had. 

“Oh Q.” His father sighed in sympathy.

“Sorry.” He looked away and wiped a tear from his eyes. 

“Ok. Get your things and we’ll go.” He half smiled as Quentin walked off to his room. 

He returned moments later with his suitcase. 

They loaded his stuff in the car and started heading north. The drive was quiet. Ted trying to come to terms with what was happening and Quentin trying to silently apologize. 

They pulled up in the front drive and a nurse came out to greet them. 

“Hello, welcome to Midtown Medical Clinic.” She slightly smiled. 

“Umm... hi... “ Quentin half mumbled. 

She led the two of them inside to the reception desk. 

“How can I help you?” The lady was older, probably slightly older than Ted. 

“Umm. I’m here to....” He looked away as his voice trailed off. 

“Are you His father?” She looked over at Ted who was looking around the room. 

“Yeah.” He said as he nodded. 

“Ok, just fill out these forms and we can get things started.”

“Great.” He half smirked taking the clipboard from her and finding a seat. 

He filled out the forms and Quentin took a seat next to him. He slightly rocked back and forth while looking around the room. 

After a few minutes Ted had the forms filled out and took them back to the desk. 

“Ok they’ll come get you in a few moments.” She smiled as she took the forms and began typing things on her computer. 

Ted just smiled and walked back over to Quentin. 

“You sure about this curly Q?”

He just nodded his head. 

Ted sighed and put his hand on Quentin’s shoulder. “Ok.” He took a deep breath. 

“Quentin Coldwater?” A nurse called. 

Quentin stood up and walked back to her. 

“I’m Quentin.” 

“Follow me.” 

She led them down a hall and down another before they reached a small room. 

“Here we are.” She motioned for him to go in. He put his suitcase in the closet. 

“Thanks.”

“We’ll be back with your clothes that you’ll wear while you’re here. We have group in an hour.” She smiled as she walked away. 

“Ok, Q, this is it.” Ted smiled and hugged Quentin.

“Thanks Dad.” Quentin hugged him back. 

After a few minutes he slowly walked away. 

Quentin walked over and sat on the bed. There wasn’t much to this place. Gray walls and simple bedding. The nurse came back and gave him gray sweats and a few t-shirts. 

Quentin went to their group therapy and didn’t say much. He mostly just observed. 

After a few days he met with a therapist on his own. 

“Quentin, what brought you to check in here?” 

“I umm... hurt myself and feel useless??” He said as he curled up in the chair. 

“How do you feel today? Do you want to hurt yourself?” 

“Not right now but I have.” His voice cracked a bit at the end. 

“I see the cuts, you want to tell me about those?” 

“I cut myself. I just couldn’t stop crying and was so numb and just wanted to feel something. I found a small knife and made sure it was sharp and cut a line. I watched the blood drip down my wrist and it felt euphoric. I did it again. I watched the blood drip and just kept going.” 

“Ok. Do you want to do it again?”

“I don’t know.... maybe?”

“Ok let’s talk about your past.” 

The conversation ranged from Quentin’s childhood memories to things that happened last week. 

After an hour the session ended and Quentin slowly stood, brushed the hair out of his face and walked back to his room. 

He sat on the bed and stared out the window. He let his mind wander to thoughts of Fillory and what it would be like to go there. Maybe he’d be happy there. 

“Lights out.” A nurse called as they slowly turned off the lights. 

Quentin crawled into bed and pulled the covers up to his neck. 

He slept slightly restlessly. 

The week went by fairly the same. Group, game time, individual therapy, reading time, arts and crafts, and lights out. It was regimented like a sort of school day. There were activities to do and checkups all day. 

After a few weeks Quentin was told there was a visitor’s day. 

Ted drive up and brought Quentin’s friend Julia with him. 

Ted visited first. They talked about how therapy was going and the new meds Quentin was on. 

Julia slowly walked over. 

“Hey Q.” She said softly. 

“Jules!” Quentin stood and hugged her. 

“How are you?” 

“It’s been weird but kind of helps.” He brushed the hair out of his eyes as he looked up at her and smiled. 

“I’m glad.” She smiled back. 

“Yeah. After the summer I should be ok to try on my own.” He said. 

“Good.” She smiled. “Hey I bought you something.” She said reaching into her bag. 

She pulled out a small box. 

“What’s this?”

“A little gift to say I’m proud of you.” She smiled as he opened the box. 

“Cards?”

“Yeah, for your tricks.” She smiled. 

“Thank you.” He hugged her. 

“Glad you like them.”

“Ok folks visiting time is over.” A nurse called out. 

Quentin said his goodbyes to his father and Julia. 

They had another group after the visitors left and then it was art and free time before bed. 

Quentin had brought one of his Fillory books so he spent his free time reading. 

Each week passed and Quentin opened up more each week. The doctors said he was making good progress and said his medications were helping. 

A few weeks passed and Ted came back. 

“Hey Q. Ready to go home?”

Quentin walked over and hugged him. 

They got in the car and headed back to Quentin’s house. 

When they got there Quentin got out and Julia ran over and hugged him. 

“Hey Jules.” He smiled. 

“Welcome home Q.” She smiled and kissed him on the cheek. 

The two walked inside with Ted following. 

Once they got inside Quentin saw some snacks and decorations. 

“What’s this?”

“Our little attempt at a welcome home party.” Ted smiled. 

“Wow. Thanks.” Quentin laughed. 

“Oh we got you a present.” Ted walked out with a small package. 

Quentin smiled and slowly unwrapped the package. 

“The new Fillory...” He said slightly shocked. 

“Yep. Went to three stores to find that.” Ted laughed. 

“Thank you.” Quentin said with slight tears in his eyes. 

“Welcome home curly Q.” He smiled and half hugged Quentin. 

Quentin and Julia went out to the other room and talked about what had happened over the summer and about Fillory. 

They laid on the floor under the table and looked up at the map of Fillory they had drawn on the table’s underside. 

“If only it was real.” Quentin laughed.

“It’s sort of a mindset, I think, like the magic in the world.” Julia smiled. 

“Maybe.” Quentin laughed. 

After a little longer Julia headed home and Quentin went off to his room and began reading his new book.


End file.
